Well, let me just say that I am in a hormonal huff today, so the demure first edit with my thoughts to this question have mostly been thrown out, and I am going for much more of a brat based reply.

You've been warned.

I should also disclose that I am single and the following reply perhaps gives you an insight into why...

I think the word partnership is a really important one here. A good partnership doesn't mean you always have to be aligned and on the same page with everything. But if there is something that is worrying you, then the other should want to hear it and see what makes sense as a logical solution/compromise/alternative. 

If you bring up something important (like the fact that should something happen to them and they can't work, you, your current assets and future goals, would be financially f* cked) and their like 'yeah, nah'... then I think you need a *hard* 'nah, yeah' conversation with them.

Ultimately, I always want conversations about money to be healthy and productive. But I also don't shy away from calling out BS and thus, I am happy to ask the uncomfortable questions and leave a suitably long, awkward silence for them to (ideally), get the point and get on board. 

Some suggested ideas for you:

- Ask them what kind of insurances they have and pay for right now? If they insure the car, the cat, the credit card but can't fathom insuring the income that supports all those things, point that out.

Frankly, if you had no income for a long period of time... you probs couldn't afford them anyway. 

- Why do you wear a seatbelt? This is a pro move to disarm and perplex them. None of us think twice about chunking in on when we get in the car, we do it because even though it may not be front of mind... every time we get into the car, there is a risk of serious injury or death.

And whilst most of us are lucky enough to enjoy car rides that are accident free, when there is one, you want to make damn sure you have a seatbelt on. It gives you the best chance of survival.

That's why we have insurance, we want you to financially survive anything that could have catastrophic implications.

- I would honestly ask point blank why?

If they insure other stuff (and the cat), they obviously understand and believe in the concept of insurance, so why when it comes to this one is there a resistance?

If they think they are fit and healthy and believe nothing is ever going to happen to them, I would strongly encourage you to organise you next date in the waiting room in the Emergency room of your local hospital (I highly recommend St Vincents on a Saturday night if you live in Sydney! I have done two weekend stints in Emergency there this year, to say it was eye-opening is an understatement!). 

- If you're still getting pushback, then say no problem. You're a pragmatic, logical, solution oriented person...

Trial a month where you both have to survive on just your income, deducting 20% for assumed additional medical costs (it could be well over, but lets leave it at that to try and play nice). You can't use credit cards or savings and must keep up with your financial obligations and I would imagine you would still need to have some sort of life, so that needs to be factored in.

After one month you can both reassess to see if it would be possible to do without massive financial consequences or implications (like, killing all your financial dreams), and take it from there.

- Or just book you both in to see an Insurance Expert and they can help you both understand what you need and why.

Get them to explain the risks and costs that could come with self-insuring when you don't have sufficient assets. Chances are that when they are hearing it from an expert (who probably has a treasure trove of war stories from people who, like them, didn't think it would happen to them and how insurance saved them from being financially screwed) they may then reassess.

Insurance can be for you. But (most often) it's also designed to help and support the people around you.

If one partner doesn't want insurance and the other partner is really worried because they don't believe they could handle the full financial responsibility of their joint lives and costs, and the other party doesn't care then that to me is a rather large 🚩. 

I've done countless things in the past because it was important for my partner. Happily.

Because if it was important to them, then it's important to me... I have sat at football games I couldn't care less about. I've travelled to strange places my partner was desperate to see. I've sat through a (long) Blink182 concert bopping my head for hours to songs I don't know or like... and I did it not because I was forced to. Because I wanted to, for them.

And, rightly or wrongly, I expect that when the time comes and I say something is important to me, they will return the favour. Because that to me is a true partnership*. 

Jess

*please note I am nothing close to a relationship expert. If you trial any of these strategies I would genuinely be interested in how you go with them.

Have a money dilemma?

Money dilemmas can be a nightmare! They can leave you up all night ruminating about what to do, have you feeling alone and isolated or just plain ol' stuck. So, we are here to help. I am going to tackle one a week and give you my unbiased, no BS general thoughts on how to tackle your conundrum. We would love for you to send yours (or someone you know) in. 

Obvs all of this is general advice only... especially important to note any and all of the comments above do not take into account your objectives, financial situation or needs. Before acting on any information, you should consider the appropriateness of the information provided and the nature of the relevant financial product having regard to your objectives, financial situation and needs.